Tigers and Cranes

There, for a time being was a big hoopla over a limited edition “Cucumber Pepsi” that were sold in Japanese conbinis. Apparently a marketing gimmick, Pepsi of Japan marketed the drink for a limited run, and then, in a bid to perhaps to create an aura of legend behind(if one can indeed create a legend around a sody-pop), stopped making any more of the stuff.

In the latest issue of Business Week, there’s an article about it:

“Only a lucky few ever got to try Pepsi’s Ice Cucumber soda. The pale green drink began appearing on shelves at Japanese convenience stores in early June… A couple of weeks later, all 4.8million bottles of Ice Cucumber had sold out. But instead of ratcheting up production, Pepsi brand managers in Japan did the unthinkable: They discontinued the drink. “We didn’t want it on the market past the summer,” says Keiko Ishihara, who oversees PepsiCo Inc. (PEP ) sales for Suntory, the Tokyo beverage maker that markets the soda giant’s products in Japan. “The value of Ice Cucumber is that it’s gone already.”

It might seem strange to kill off a product at the peak of its popularity. But for Pepsi, Ice Cucumber was largely a marketing stunt: a way to generate buzz for the brand in what is arguably the world’s most cutthroat beverage market. It’s a $30 billion-a-year business in Japan, spanning everything from run-of-the-mill brown colas to drinks derived from green tea, coffee, and even kimchee, the spicy cabbage mix that is a staple of Korean cuisine. Of the estimated 1,500 drinks that come to market each year, only a handful survive long enough to win a loyal following.”

This is what I find most perplexing. Not the fact that the drink was on the market for a couple of weeks, but rather, this writer of the article mentions a “drink derived from ‘kimchee’, the spicy cabbage mix that is a staple of Korean cuisine.”

I suspect the reporter has never traveled to Japan, and certainly not for this story, since the whole “Kimchi Drink” thing is a hoax, perpetrated first here, at good ol’ Tigers and Cranes. Here’s the article from September of last year, where I talk about “Kimchi Coolpis”, a non-existent beverage thought to be found in Korea, and certainly not in Japan.

Don’t believe everything you hear…

Ramen.

I personally like mine “Sapporo Style”, with lots of seafood and miso based as opposed to shio(salt) or shoyu(soy sauce) based. This is no secret, and thus I am biased. And when in comes to instant stuff, Nissin Curry Cup Ramen is pretty excellent.

But, strangely, this particular thought never occured to me: Canned Ramen.

I mean, there are canned oden out there, as well beef stew, so why not the ultimate in convenience food, ramen?

This situation is rectified, as one can now buy canned ramen from a vending machine that pops out all heated up.

Canned ramen noodles are here. I can’t believe this wasn’t developed until now; you’d think the Japanese have seen Campbell’s Soup before, or at least an Andy Warhol painting or two. But anyway, here it is, and apparently it’s quite popular. Takeshi Yamada, owner of the famed Menya Musashi ramen shop in Tokyo, put east and west together to create this product to offset the food shortage caused by the Niigata earthquake of 2004. Like Chikin Ramen, dire times are the mothers of invention. My hat’s off to Yamada-san. Plus, you can buy it hot out of a Japanese vending machine! Get your ramen to go, along with a cup of Boss Coffee or a pet bottle of Ooi o-cha!

Rockin’. I hope it vends a pair of chopstix too…

via Rameniac

From my Hollywood contact in the Global Tigers and Cranes Enterprise, report of “Hadaka Sushi“, AKA Nekkid Women Sushi.

Basically, this sushi restaurant from Hollywood(where else?) serves morsels of food, mainly sushi, on naked people. At first I was going to remark that this restaurant is chauvinistic, and sexist, as I thought they serve food only on top of women’s body. Then I read a little further, and it seems that you can order food on naked dudes as well. Okaay…

Called “Nyotai Mori”, here’s the description of what goes on at this joint.

“Also referred to as “body sushi”, nyotaimori is the practice of eating sashimi or sushi from the body of the woman”.

I quote. It’s markedly different from cannibalism, where the flesh of the said woman is eaten.

“Sushi is not merely food,(it isn’t?) but the culinary expression of art and sensuality. At Hadaka Sushi, the gourmet experience is taken to a new level as the model’s inherent beauty and energy enhances the exquisite cuisine.”

“The food never touches the model’s skin(whew!), but instead is presented on banana leaves draped on top of the flower-adorned body.”

So, how much for this “expression of sensuality and art”? Try $1100. And, the website notes, it doesn’t include food(what the hell?!), beverage (oh, double snaps!), nor room charge(restaurants now charge for rooms?!), nor, tax and gratuity, which, I suppose is fair. Let’s see, what is the tax and tip for a $1100 “model fee” sans food and drinks and shit? uhm… gotta bust out my calculator… punching some numbers in… well, it looks like additional $300 or so, and you still haven’t even touched the food.

And, for $6000, one can order the “premium package”, which does include food and booze.

The idea of eating food off a person kind of gives me the creeps, but hey, different strokes to float your boat, I guess.

Earlier I wrote about really creative bento (Japanese lunch box) art by a Korean. Granted, the previous ones I highlighted were rather cute (to the point where if I was given one for lunch, I really wouldn’t want to eat it), but this time around, I present you with some creepy bento from a Japanese bento maker.

I mean, what?

Trolling through Flickr one day, I came across this disturbing image.

According to the person who took this picture, these weirdos would stand absolutely still and when passersby walk by, would scare the bejeezus out of them by grabbing them.

Kinda enough to make me swear Pepsi off forever, but hey, I’m no marketing genius…

Two Japanese products, for whatever reason, that amuse me. First up, “Diet water” from everyone’s favorite brewery, Sapporo.

Thank goodness for this product. I’ve had it with all the fattening, high calorie water.

Next up, uh… “Homo Sausage”.

Hmm… Those two words probably feel really awkward being next to one another.

Onigiri, or those triangular shaped balls of rice is pretty ubiquitous in both Korea and Japan. Simple to make, easy to carry, and eat a few of them, and you’re pretty much set for lunch.

You can’t avoid them, especially in Japan, as they are sold in all the convenience stores and most markets. They, of course, come in different flavors, from the all-time classic umeboshi, the ones with salted, sour plum in the middle, to bonito fish flakes, sea weed, etc.

The ubiquitous “conbini onigiri”

Many people just make em at home, as I tried, but I just ended up making a mess everywhere. I might need more practice.

For those parents who want their little kid to have a special onigiri at school, here’s a “soccer-nori” packaging, in which all you have to do is apply carefully these sea laver on to a really round ball of rice.

wish I had some as a kid.

I came across this website called “Etsy”. Basically, it’s like Ebay, except, I suppose, it’s a place where one sells and buys stuff that is hand made. I wish I would have thought of it.

Now I knew a guy who was so talented, or had a lot of free time on his hands, that he made his own wallet… out of duct tape. Why on earth would you be carrying a wallet made of duct tape, I dunno, but I did appreciate the effort and the ingenuity that went into making such a product.

Which also reminds me of a story told by my old co worker, who said to never carry one of those velcro surfer wallets.

“Why not?” I asked. I have a beat up leather one, but I was still curious.
“Well, let’s say that you were on a date, and you pulled out your wallet. And what is the sound that the velcro wallet make when you open it?” He replied.
“Hm. The velcro sound?”
“Yeah, and it sounds like this to your date: ‘CHEAAAAAAAAAP’” Ha ha ha! he did the perfect velcro opening sound.

Well, you just had to be there.

Anyway, back to Etsy. I found this item for sale, and it’s relevant to this website, since it’s a “Ramen wallet.”

Pretty cool, huh? And the maker had the good taste to use the shrimp flavor packaging (no visible or discernible shrimp chunks, those lying Top Ramen jerks) though He/She claims that it can be made with bunch of other flavors too. Including “Oriental Flavor.” Hm? Where’s the Occidental flavor?

Tres Chic, regardless.

Go ahead and bid on it, make the wallet-smith a little richer by bidding on the item!

As I wandered through the vast city of Seoul, my eyes kept catching glimpses of something called “Hi Seoul Festival”. From what I could glean from hyperkinetic posters on trainstation walls and taxis and generally, well, everywhere, it’s supposed to be about music, food, and fun and such. When was Seoul NOT about these things? Anyway, it seemed like there would be way too many people at these things, so I decided to skip it.

What I ended up doing was visiting the “63 Building” on Yoido, so called that because it has, you know, 63 floors. And it was feautured in Sim City 3000. Really.

By no means a very tall building elsewhere, but regardless, it’s pretty damn tall building in Korea(3rd tallest), and I, lacking much else to do, went to check it out. It being a Saturday, the building was mobbed with crowds everywhere, and lunatic kids running around. But, on the bottom of the building cafe, I got a very decent cup of iced coffee, so there is that.

Now I’ve been on some tall building in my time, such as… uhm… Empire State Building, Eiffel Tower, etc., so the height of the building wasn’t necessarily impressing me, but at the same time, being a total acrophobiac, it did give me a good dose of vertigo regardless.

The observation deck has some pretty spectacular views of the Han River, many bridges, mountains, and many, many stacks of ubiquitous Korean high rise apartments. They sure look drab from the outside, but believe you me… some of them are like palaces inside. The day was a particulary un-hazy day, so it seemed like one could see for miles all around.

It’s said that a woman should not wear a dress or a skirt when she visits the observation deck of this building. Those words mystified me until I was there. I’ll keep the suspense for you readers for you to find out why for yourselves. All I have to say is I wish maybe more women should wear skirts visiting this place. But then, I’m also a pervert.

Leaving the “63 Building”, I headed to the banks of the River Han, to see what the hell all the commotion was, with balloons and and tents and stuff. And Lo! One of my favorite things, a Food Fair! Being Famished, this is like an oasis in a desert. I hurriedly made my way towards the tents that had smoke pouring out of them. And you know, where there’s smoke, there’s grilled meat!

There were maybe 50 stalls stationed along the bank of the river, serving everything from Bulgogi(grilled beef), spicy yakitori, fried chicken, bibimbap, korean seafood pancakes, pigs parts, corn, well, you name it. They even had Bun-deh-gi, the pupa of a moth or something. And yes, I had some.

The food was very delicious and generous in portion. I was happy to find several tents vending ice cold Cass beer, and it seemed like all was right with the world. To top it all off, nearby was a free concert, feauturing neo-classical Korean folk music and Fusion-y Traditional Korean music with some funky World beats.

And I realize that this is one of the “Hi Seoul Festivals” that I thought I’d give a miss. Kind of glad the way it worked out, though.

It is with certainty that I can say that I’ve never once seen a “Mr.Donut” restaurant in America. It purportedly began selling donuts first in Boston, a city I have visited many a times, but not once have I had the pleasure of being in, let alone seeing one there. Dunkin’ Donuts? Yes. Boston’s filthy with them. But Mister Donut? Not so much.

This strikes me as kind of odd, since Mister Donut, AKA “Misdo” is practically everywhere in Japan. I love this place, since this is one place you can get their trademarked, and indeed, their most well known donut, the “Pon-de-Ringu”, roughly translated “Ring of Bubbles”. It’s called that since the donut, which is handmade, has a shape of ring of pons. Bubbles, I mean.

The chewy pastry even has its own mascot, the greedy lion called “Pon-de-Lion”, whose mane is made of, you guessed it, pon de ringus. He’s sort of an auto-cannibal, as the brochure states that whenever he gets hungry, he eats his own pons around his head. I mean, comeon, this has to violate some kind of second law of thermodynamics or something. He eats his own mane?

Whatever, the food there is delicious, and I used to be a regular eater at the joint. Not only are delicious pastries sold, but you could get things like soup and noodles, which to me, is pretty radical. I was once obsessed with getting a “Pingu” plate and bowl set, which had the most kickass penguin imprints on the plate and the bowl, all for you if you collected enough points on your “Misdo card”. Is it weird to be this infatuated with a donutery? Perhaps. But if you were to ever eat in one, you might understand.

Korea has been cruelly deprived of this fine eatery, instead, Seoulites having to make do with previously mentioned “Dunkin’ Donuts”, which, bizarrely enough in Korea, is considered a nice place to take your dates. Kind of different where Dunkin’ is a grumpy taxi driver’s hang out in America.

I did take coffee and donut in Dunkin’ Donut in Myun-Don in Seoul, and smack dab in the middle of crowded streets of Myun-Don, it’s a three floors of donut and coffee extravaganza. My experience was tainted by the fact that in Korea, if you want a bag for your purchases, you have to pay… like a nickel or something. But damn, yo! that stuff adds up!

Anyway, I had my plate of donuts and coffee to eat in, but because I suck at speaking Korean, the mean ol’ counter lady ended up charging me for the packaging, as if my food was to go.

Enough about Dunkin’ Donuts. What you really want to know more about is Misdo, isn’t it? Well, so one day I was strolling through the streets of Myun-Don, I see plastered on a window of a convenience store a sign that reads “Korea’s First Mister Donut! Opening Soon! in Myun-Don!”

Damn, this got me all hot and bothered.

So, on the morning of the grand opening, I waited in line to be one of the first 250 customers to walk through the door, so I could win a prize. I have to say, I hate waiting in lines, and I would never wait in line for say, a concert or PS3 or what have you, but dude! This is Pon-de-Ringu we’re talking about, so I lined up with about 500 other hungry Koreans in the morning before Misdo’s grand opening.

Oh, it was grand.

There were costumed Pon de Lions prowling about, and balloons, and streamers and well, the anticipation was at a fever pitch!

I was maybe first 200 to reach the door, and for my trouble, I could draw for a prize… grand prize being free donuts for a year! In my head, visions of me as a fat pudgy bastard floated around. Eagerly, with the help of ever helpful Pon de Lion, I drew out the prize of…

Pon de Lion Cell phone strap.

Well, it’s not a year’s worth of free donuts, but I’ll take what I can get.

Oh, and the donuts?

Very delicious, chewy, warm, and not too sweet. It’s everything that it should be in a donut, now available in Seoul. So, if you’re ever in the area (Near Saboten Shinjuku Tonkatsu/Omutomato), go in and say “hi” to Pon de Lion.

And eat his mane before the greedy bastard eats his own.